"In his testimony, Justin argued that polygamy is the foundation of faith in Africa and warned about the risk of alienation should the Catholic Church insist on monogamy.
“Belief is a religion; religion on the other hand is culture, and our culture here in Africa is polygamy,” the father of 12 said, a…
"In his testimony, Justin argued that polygamy is the foundation of faith in Africa and warned about the risk of alienation should the Catholic Church insist on monogamy.
“Belief is a religion; religion on the other hand is culture, and our culture here in Africa is polygamy,” the father of 12 said, and added, “As Africans, we believe that polygamy is wealth and a source of blessings.” "
I'm sure that the Aztecs would have said that human sacrifice is a "source of blessings," too, and that slave holders in the Ante Bellum south would have said slaves are a source of "wealth."
And the Romans and Greeks would have definitely said that men having sexual access to anything they could claim ownership was their "culture."
If being a Christian means being counter-cultural, I know what the obvious Christian reaction to polygamy is.
They might. Men who can afford to have more wives are generally wealthier than those who can only afford one. If the cultural expectation is polygamy, they might not think it problematic, or have anything to compare to. Especially if they were raised with polygamous parents.
How many women in the west feel happy to have a good husband, even though he looks at porn?
It also sounds like there's some polyandry in Africa as well.
Look I’m sure there are exceptions but it doesn’t Matter if it’s culturally normative. Humans aren’t good at sharing. Especially when it’s one way sharing.
Jealousy among wives when polygamy exists is a known thing. Competition for whose kids get what and also the awful horrible emotional consequences of other women being sexually accessible to your husband. I’m just telling you money only buys so much happiness and how “blessed” these polygamous marriages are is a selling point on the husbands 🙄
Your porn addicted western husbands is a great comparison - MANY of those wives, Christian or not, are super hurt and damaged by this and are NOT happy.
The two shall become ONE flesh is written into our very bones.
It is. As I understand it, porn usage is a major contributor to divorce, unhappy marriages that don't lead to divorce (including where both spouses think and say they're happy), and I suspect it is also a major contributor to women avoiding marriage. Becoming one with someone who will blithely and regularly hurt you that badly is not appealing.
But our ability to lie to ourselves about our happiness (and to anyone who asks, perhaps especially the polygamous husband) is truly impressive. There are also many women in the West who watch porn with their husbands and consider it a good thing. There are others who advocate for "open" marriages, orgies, etc. The West doesn't have a monopoly on self-deception. African wives are just as capable.
I think this is the crux of the issue:
"In his testimony, Justin argued that polygamy is the foundation of faith in Africa and warned about the risk of alienation should the Catholic Church insist on monogamy.
“Belief is a religion; religion on the other hand is culture, and our culture here in Africa is polygamy,” the father of 12 said, and added, “As Africans, we believe that polygamy is wealth and a source of blessings.” "
I'm sure that the Aztecs would have said that human sacrifice is a "source of blessings," too, and that slave holders in the Ante Bellum south would have said slaves are a source of "wealth."
And the Romans and Greeks would have definitely said that men having sexual access to anything they could claim ownership was their "culture."
If being a Christian means being counter-cultural, I know what the obvious Christian reaction to polygamy is.
Also I’d be curious to hear from the wives about whether they feel wealthy and blessed 😒
They might. Men who can afford to have more wives are generally wealthier than those who can only afford one. If the cultural expectation is polygamy, they might not think it problematic, or have anything to compare to. Especially if they were raised with polygamous parents.
How many women in the west feel happy to have a good husband, even though he looks at porn?
It also sounds like there's some polyandry in Africa as well.
Look I’m sure there are exceptions but it doesn’t Matter if it’s culturally normative. Humans aren’t good at sharing. Especially when it’s one way sharing.
Jealousy among wives when polygamy exists is a known thing. Competition for whose kids get what and also the awful horrible emotional consequences of other women being sexually accessible to your husband. I’m just telling you money only buys so much happiness and how “blessed” these polygamous marriages are is a selling point on the husbands 🙄
Your porn addicted western husbands is a great comparison - MANY of those wives, Christian or not, are super hurt and damaged by this and are NOT happy.
The two shall become ONE flesh is written into our very bones.
It is. As I understand it, porn usage is a major contributor to divorce, unhappy marriages that don't lead to divorce (including where both spouses think and say they're happy), and I suspect it is also a major contributor to women avoiding marriage. Becoming one with someone who will blithely and regularly hurt you that badly is not appealing.
But our ability to lie to ourselves about our happiness (and to anyone who asks, perhaps especially the polygamous husband) is truly impressive. There are also many women in the West who watch porn with their husbands and consider it a good thing. There are others who advocate for "open" marriages, orgies, etc. The West doesn't have a monopoly on self-deception. African wives are just as capable.